Journey to the "dark roasted" side

It's Monday morning, and I'm tempted to go over to the dark side.
No, I'm not talking about joining Darth Vader's quest for universal domination, nor am I planning on listening to Pink Floyd's eighth studio album. The dark side I'm thinking about crossing involves caffeine – specifically, coffee.
I've never been a coffee drinker. In fact, I've only drank one cup of joe in my 26 years. Even working at Tim Hortons for nearly three years as a teenager, I didn't indulge in Canada's unofficial hot beverage.

But today I just can't seem to wake up and I need a boost – and my green tea with honey isn't doing the trick.
Sometimes when I'm really tired I have an energy drink. But I would feel unprofessional sipping a Red Bull in the newsroom. When I think of Red Bull drinkers, I imagine party animals, running on 30 minutes sleep, and still tipsy from the previous night's bender.
For me, it seems foolish to drink a Red Bull after I stayed up too late Sunday night ironing my weekly work clothes and watching 60 Minutes.
This isn't the first time I've been tempted to turn to coffee on a miserable Monday morning. But the same ritual fears continue to hold me back from crossing over to the dark side.
First, I hate the taste of coffee (although I love the smell). Second, I don't want to become dependent on caffeine. I see coffee addicts everywhere. These are the people who can't start work, wake up or hold a conversation without their much-needed morning java fix. I don't want to be that person.
But I don't want to be the person I am right now, either – a zombie.
So what is a young journalist to do?
As I look around the office I see Starbucks cups or refillable mugs on almost every desk.
Coffee, believed to have originated in Ethiopia, is one of the most widely drank beverages in the world. From South America to the Middle East, everyone seems to be drinking coffee. Maybe I should just join the masses. Then when a friend or co-worker does a Tim Hortons run I wouldn't have to sheepishly ask for a jelly donut.
But on second thought I see a flaw in caffeine consumption. Yes, coffee drinkers perk up after getting their java fix, but that high is short-lived, then it's right back to where they started an hour ago.
Meanwhile, I'm only getting more awake as the day goes on.
So I'll leave coffee to the caffeine consumers, Red Bull to the rock stars, and I'll just try to get to bed on time in the future.